BRIDGET

I know. What about sweet and sour prawn balls?

Sweet for me...

NICK

And sour for Hector's mum!

BRIDGET

Nick, behave.

HECTOR

Very funny.

I will cook dinner.

BRIDGET

And Nick will look after your mother because he's such a gentleman now.

NICK

Don't you worry about Mrs R. She'll have a great time. Leave it to me.

HECTOR

So, Annie, will you pretend?

ANNIE

OK, Hector. For you, tonight I will pretend to be the perfect girlfriend.

BRIDGET

Annie, you and I are going shopping.

BRIDGET

It’s obvious.

Urrghh! Too Margaret Thatcher.

Hector will love it, but, no.

Perfect!

ANNIE [Composing email]

MRS ROMERO

Don't touch her!

ANNIE

Your mother's right. Don't touch me!

ANNIE [Composing email]

BRIDGET

No!

HECTOR

You can pretend to be what my mother wants.

ANNIE

What? Princess Caroline of Monaco?

BRIDGET

Perfect!

BRIDGET [Composing email]

NICK

Yeah.

Slave.

Assorted background noises

HECTOR

Wow! Annie! You look great.

ANNIE

I look 45 years old.

HECTOR

But my mother will like it.

Sound of knocking on door

NICK

Ah-hah-hah!

Snap!

MRS ROMERO

Versace?

ANNIE

Marks and Spencer's.

HECTOR

… … … … …

MRS ROMERO

Yes …………………......

BRIDGET

Have you enjoyed your visit to London, Mrs Romero?

MRS ROMERO

I love London. We often visit our friends, Liz and Phil.

ANNIE

And where do they live?

MRS ROMERO

Buckingham Palace.

NICK

There you are, Mrs Romero.

MRS ROMERO

Oh, you're so handsome, Nick.

HECTOR

Annie has had an interesting day today, haven't you, Annie.

Go on, Annie, tell Mother about your interesting day.

ANNIE

OK. Well, our GM protest went very well today.

MRS ROMERO

What's GM?

BRIDGET

I don't know. Erm, Great Men, a Great Men protest.

MRS ROMERO

Really?

ANNIE

It means genetically modified.

HECTOR

Listen, Mum.

ANNIE

So, so the farmer came over to see what we were doing...

MRS ROMERO

Oh, GM, GM! Gorgeous Men! Oooh!

NICK

Another drink, Mrs R?

MRS ROMERO

Oh yes, Nick, please.

You have lovely eyes.

ANNIE

Anyway, he told us to go away and when we wouldn't...

NICK

There you are, madam.

MRS ROMERO

Where did you learn your beautiful manners?

NICK

Oh, I was born with them.

MRS ROMERO

Sit down.

ANNIE

And then the police arrested us, but I escaped prison so I could be here tonight.

HECTOR

[Laughs nervously]

It is a joke!

Come on, Mum, talk to Annie.

MRS ROMERO

So Annie, Hector tells me you like animals.

ANNIE

Oh, I love them, but I don't eat them. I'm a vegetarian.

MRS ROMERO

How odd.

NICK

If we cannot eat animals, why are they made of meat then? Ha-ha-ha-ha!